Trashy Tuesday - What Else Is New?

New developments here on our street.  Our respected city streets department have put up emergency No Parking signs on both sides of the street.  I think they realized after drilling holes in the street a few weeks ago and stuffing socks in the holes that perhaps they should give the impression that the drilling was planned all along.  For some people, this causes a grave inconvenience.  Novel off street parking has been developed.  Lets see how this works out.

Over the past few meals with our family, a recurring theme has evolved - my limited food choices and also my lack of trying new foods.  Like all situations that involve our family, it is ALWAYS 3 to 1. Three women to one poor old decrepit man.  For the most part these situations are like water rolling off a ducks back.  I have learned to ignore these votes.  I was a farm boy growing up where we believed in eating the three food groups - meat, potatoes and gravy.  I knew nothing of a food pyramid until joining up with my current wife, Sue.  Vegetables were just tolerated occasionally and were limited to peas and corn.  Apples, cherries, oranges and grapefruit were served on special occasions only.  My aversion to being venturesome with food stems from when I was ten, I think.  My mom, always trying to please, served sliced canned peaches at one meal.  I dug in eagerly since these were specials we didn't normally have.  I took a big bite, chewed and gagged.  She served APRICOTS under the guise of peaches.  I felt totally betrayed.  I never again completely trusted any ones cooking.

Over the years as I refined my palate, I learned that fruits with little seeds such as strawberries did not go down well.  I also learned to eliminate vegetables that had seeds you ate such as tomatoes, green beans.  I think there is a subconscious fear that the seeds will grow in your stomach if swallowed.  I also ignore funny vegetables like cauliflower, asparagus, broccoli and etc.  They just don't look like they should be eaten.  On and on it goes.  Who can blame a guy who was subjected to apricots when thinking they were peaches after all.  It is no wonder my mind is so completely warped.

You can understand my trepidation when presented with the challenge of tasting a bite of homemade lasagna that Jenny made.  Usually this has cottage cheese in it.  I don't like cottage cheese for a couple of reasons.  First the words "cottage" and "cheese" don't really seem to belong together.  Secondly, anything resembling curds can not be good for you and should not be eaten.  Reluctantly, I tried a little piece.  Actually, it was almost a fork full.   I made my usual gagging sounds, scrunched up my face and chewed as frantically as I could.  I tried to avoid as many taste buds as I could while chewing and then I gulped it down.  Took a drink of water and said, "There that wasn't so bad."  They didn't hear me because they were laughing too loud.  My food fears just continued to get reinforced regardless of how nonsensical they are.

MacBlu was so enthused by the idea of a word of the week idea that he submitted his own.  Actually, I think this is more of a phrase.  I am not a grammarian as you may have guessed if you have read any of the previous blogs.  Try his words on for size, kick the tires, and see what you think of this submission.  I have done this and an still trying to figure out what it means.

Word(s) of the Week:  ESCHEW OBFUSCATION
(submitted by my neighbor MacBlu)

Kinnick is having a downer of a day.  I decided to give him the day off from training.  He suffers from allergies I think.  He is scratching here and there.  Actually getting some sores started.   We have been putting salve on these spots.  He is really acting uncomfortable.  He sleeps for a while, gets up and can't figure out what to do next so he barks at me.  I rub and scratch him and he will lay down for a while longer.  He has a pained look in his eyes.  Poor thing.

Debby, the younger elder, is having a birthday in a couple of weeks.  I have no idea what to get this child.  She has about everything a person needs and then some.  She always likes shoes and purses but her closet is full of these things.  Any suggestions are welcome.

I have alluded in the past to giving up my handyman work for the family.  I have even gone so far as to try to give away my tools to no avail.  Seems as though most males my age have hit the wall on handyman projects also.  You can understand my shock when at lunch with Sue and Jenny, I unthinkingly VOLUNTEERED to fix a window for Jenny.  No sooner were the words out of my mouth when I began regretting what I had just agreed to do.  When will this all end.   A couple of weeks ago, I screwed up my courage to replace our bathroom exhaust fan.  I was pretty proud of myself.  The finished job looked reasonably good and it even worked which for me was a plus. Imagine if you will, my utter horror last night. After a nice soothing hot shower, I turned on the exhaust fan to remove some of the humid hot air. You should have heard the god awful screeching fan noise when I turned it on. I mean really.  I quickly turned it off, vowed to never turn it on again and wondered how to break the news to Sue.  Still working on this.  I have no illusions of getting it fixed, it will be ornamental from now on.