Trashy Tuesday Again

I have been reminded a couple of times this week the meaning of this blogs tag line - "Life Seen Through Dog-Licked Glasses!". First - Kinnick, yellow Lab, is Jenny the elders dog. I have been helping her replace carpet and railings on her steps. This has proven to be an arduous task especially for one who has desperately been trying to get out of the handyman mode. During this time, Kinnick has decided that his role is to make certain that all sweat has been removed from your face, neck, arms and legs. This is very kind of him and it is a task that he can perform very well. For those of us who wear glasses this is not always too good. He got a little exuberant one day. He gave one lens a dog lick bifocal. Yes, a very nice lick stripe across the bottom half of my right lens. I didn't realize it immediately and continued to work. After a while I began thinking that everything looked a little wacky, out of focus sort of.

The second occurrence happened Sunday evening. Jenny, Debby, and Granddogs have been assembling at our house to have supper and watch "The Amazing Race". I settled into my recliner as is the custom. The pugs, Barney & Max immediately jump up to secure a favorite resting spot on my lap. Before they can settle in, they must "negotiate" for their spots. This involves a spirited dancing sequence including doggie songs. It also includes them ganging up on Grandpa and trying to lick off the nose on my face. Pugs are not known for licking accuracy but they are known for being enthusiastic. They proceeded to leave dog licks on both lens with 100 percent coverage.

Now I don't know how many of you have had a similar experience so let me fill you in. A light headiness comes over you. You are not as steady on your feet as you remember. Your mind races to compensate but is at a loss to understand what has happened to your eyes. Your mind explores all areas producing random, disconnected thoughts and images. Kind of hallucinogenic.   These experiences led to the blog tag line - "Life Seen Through Dog-Licked Glasses!"  A slow realization comes over you that perhaps, just perhaps, your eyeglasses are dirty. Eureka! Next problem is how to get dog saliva off of the lenses. Dried dog saliva is a bear to get off. It has a thick, rather slimy feel. I use alcohol wipes. They work in a fashion but require several cleanings. This saliva penetrates the seams between your lenses and the frame. As you rub across the lens with the wipe, it will pickup the hidden saliva and leave a very nice smear. This goes on and on until all of the hidden material has been exhausted. Tedious - yes but very comforting to see normally again. 

I was so anxious to see my doctor again.  I didn't have a very good experience the last time you may remember.  I had questions and he only budgeted 4 minutes for me.  He promptly pointed to a sign and told me he didn't have time.  For the last 3 months, I have been planning my strategy for this next visit.  I went yesterday at the appointed time.  Checked in with the receptionist.  I was primed and ready to get it on.  She politely informed me that she didn't have me listed.  She told me my appointment was NEXT Monday.  Crushed and embarrassed, I did an about face and got out of there as quickly as possible.  Oops!

Word of the Week:  higgledy-piggledy

A very good friend of mine in Iowa City and a faithful follower of the Drivel has submitted some more "crabs"

for the crabby list:

Weather that is like English weather when you are not IN England.

Weather that is dreary and gloomy EVERYDAY.

Weather that makes you want to wear your skiing neck warmer everywhere.

Weather that makes wearing sandals an impossible dream.

Weather that makes one want to nap all day.

Iowa weather!

Ever wonder why you are not permitted to go out a door with a lighted "EXIT" sign above.  Apparently some stores have specific entry doors and separate exit doors.  The other day I was in a new Theisens store.  It was very nice.  I purchased a couple of items, paid for them and began to look for a way out of the store.  Not too far to my left was a door labeled EXIT.  Off I go pleased with my purchase only to realize someone was yelling at me.  It was some store flunky.  I turned and was informed not so pleasantly that "that" door was not the way out even though it had a lighted exit sign above the door.  I explained this to him.  My explanation must have been too technical because he didn't get the drift.  I bowed my head and allowed him to the real exit door.  If these no exit doors are emergency exits, should they not be so labeled?  I would recommend a sign change.  Let these special exits read "Emergency Exit".  That way it would end all of my confusion.  I was crabby for the rest of the day.

Yeah, I guess we finally found and took care of Bin Laden.  Didn't take long for us to find him.  He was living in Pakistan for 6 years next to the police training headquarters.  Hmmm!

MacBlu, my next door neighbor, was not one of those however.  Sue, my current wife,  got out of bed around 7:30.  She took the last little scrap of garbage out.  She informed me that MacBlu was just getting his out.  Must have been a sleep in day.  I didn't get the memo, I guess.   The President of the Neighborhood Garbage Watch Association doesn't always get included it seems.

higgledy-piggledy - In utter disorder or confusion.  There have been times I have been accused of being higgledy-piggledy.  Can you believe it?  

Time to get gym togs on and get pumped up for a workout.  My body is not responding very well to the thought of a workout.  I abused it the weekend and it is rebelling.  Until we meet again.  TA!