“The trouble is that everyone talks about reforming others, and no one thinks about reforming himself.” Peter Alcantara
Shout – Out!!! A birdie has told me that a crafty lady has completed her 1,000 miles on a cycle. Congratulations.
Good morning Drivellers. Just how in the heck are you? I think I have a fighting chance so let's begin....
Dear paranoid people who check behind their shower curtains for murderers, if you do find one, what's your plan?
Have you heard this one? A dyslexic man walks into a bra....
That same dyslexic man walked into the bra with a slab of asphalt under his arm. He says to the bartender: “A beer please, and one for the road.” Standing next to this guy was a jumper cable. Yep, a jumper cable. The bartender says to the jumper cable, “I'll serve you, but don't start anything.” Along the bar next to the jumper cable stood two peanuts and one was a salted. One peanut asked the jumper cable: “What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.” Speaking of fish, oh I guess that was the peanut speaking. Oh well, two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says “Dam!” Are you awake yet? Kind of an unusual fast start for this old guy. I usually kind of ease into it. Must be the new shipment of French Roast.
We all are aging. Some quicker than others but still aging. Each of us need to read this following article over and over until it becomes part of who we are.
How To Stay Young
1. Try everything twice. On one woman's tombstone she said she wanted this epitaph: "Tried everything twice. Loved it both times!"
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. (Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches!)
3. Keep learning: Learn more about the computer, crafts, and gardening, whatever... Never let the brain get idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.' And the devil's name is Alzheimer's!
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath. And if you have a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots of time with HIM/HER.
6.. The tears happen: Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. LIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love: whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, and hobbies, whatever.. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9. Don't take guilt trips.. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is.
10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity. I love you, my special friend!
11. Forgive now those who made you cry. You might not get a second chance..
Have you ever had to go to the doctor's office? Maybe you had a cold, flu or an infected splinter in your finger or whatever. I would guess that most of you have. Well, Charles, not his real name, may not have had that opportunity. Anyway, those of us who spend much time in a doctor's office should appreciate this! They are terribly inefficient. I have this friend named Kevin. We had a chat the other day at Coffeesmiths. I was telling him how many tests I have had at the VA and can't find any answers. We generally bad mouthed doctors and the time wasted with them. At which point, he related this experience he had with his doctor. Here's what happened to Kevin. Kevin walked into a doctor's office and the receptionist asked him what he had. Kevin said: 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his name, address, medical insurance number and told him to have a seat. Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out and asked Kevin what he had.... Kevin said, 'Shingles.' So she wrote down his height, weight, a complete medical history and told Kevin to wait in the examining room. A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Kevin what he had. Kevin said, 'Shingles..' So the nurse gave Kevin a blood test, a blood pressure test, an electrocardiogram, and told Kevin to take off all his clothes and wait for the doctor. An hour later the doctor came in and found Kevin sitting patiently in the nude and asked Kevin what he had. Kevin said, 'Shingles.' The doctor asked, 'Where?' Kevin said, 'Outside on the truck...Where do you want me to unload 'em?'
September Is National Suicide Prevention Month
Veteran suicides now account for many more deaths among veterans than the number killed in combat. One statistic that veterans’ groups offered at the time: for every veteran killed by enemy combatants, 25 veterans kill themselves.
Those who say “there is no such thing as a stupid question:....
Have never worked in Customer Service. I have to stop saying “How stupid can you be?” Too many people are taking it as a challenge.
Remember! Lost time can never be found. Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Wine does not make you FAT.... it makes you LEAN.....(against tables, chairs, floors, walls). Thank You for today- you made it better!!!
There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service. – TA!
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