“When writing the story of your life, don’t let anyone else hold the pen.” - Unknown
Good morning Drivelers,
Grandpaw Bailey bringing you today's Drivel Over Coffee from the swankiest, state of the art doggie fitness center in Eastern Iowa. Yep Grandpaw Bailey's Doggie Fitness Center and Spa. They have a full house this week so I thought it appropriate. I am seated up in the “Cat Walk”; about 20 feet above the floor. From this view I can see everything going on. It only makes sense that “cat walk” is high above the floor. Any lower and the clients would be up to no good. Wendy was telling me when I came in to setup that they are booked full. Wendy is the summer intern and mans the reception desk. She took a moment to point out the different areas of the club. She told me to pay particular attention to the French doggie bidet. It is fascinating to watch the old timers take their potty break. I grabbed a fresh ground and brewed cup of French Roast and made my way up the stairs.
Once situated I took a look around. Boy, what a view. I spotted Olga over in the weight machine area. Sparkle was leading a group of puppies in a doggie Zumba class. Looks as if the puppies were catching on pretty quickly with the exception of a little dachshund. Don't think Zumba is quite right for her. Miranda and Flex were life guarding at the pool area and Tanisa was watching over the solar tanning center. She also is in charge of the physical therapy clinic.
Things are picking up it looks like. Hold on, coming in the door is.......yes, it is Captain Oblivious.. You know him. He is in a variety of commercials on TV these days. He is talking to Wendy, getting red faced and stomps out. Don't know what that was all about. There goes a nice looking white poodle into the French Doggie Bidet. First one today. Gosh darn, that is fascinating. She knew just what to do including the little squirt of water at the end. Didn't surprise her at all. Wow, Wendy was right that is cool.
Researching this week's blog I ran across an interesting list of unique town and city names in the United States. Believe it or not, these are actual towns with human inhabitants and everything. Picture yourself living in one of these towns.
1. Coxsackie, New York
2. Intercourse, Pennsylvania
3.Blue Ball, Pennsylvania
4.Mianus, Connecticut
5.Big Beaver, Pennsylvania
6.Muff, Pennsylvania
7.Shaft, Maryland
8.Dick, Pennsylvania
9.Virginville, Pennsylvania
10.Bumpass, Virginia
To my readers outside of the city of 5 smells, I apologize as much as I possibly can for the condition of our streets. Although I have nothing to do with them other than pay my property taxes and hope that I get something in return. By the condition of our streets, it appears our tax money has funded the college education of a number of councilmen, financed the purchase of fancy vacation homes, boats, and trips. Our tax money certainly has not found its way to our streets in any meaningful way. Don't get me wrong, our streets department does send out a token truck with 3 or 4 guys, one shovel and half full of patching asphalt. They patch a pothole in a previously patched pothole. Yep, 3 guys watch the 4th one get a scoop of material, drop it in the hole, tamp it a couple of times. They will move a few feet to the next one. So goes their day, week, summer and fall. Trust me, the newly applied patch will disappear in two weeks or so. That is just the way it rolls, I guess. I would move away, and probably should, except it is a “nice” place to live!
I see over in the spa, Barney the black pug has a session at the solar tanning bed. He is dog-face down (a little yoga also) and soaking in the rays. Eyes are closed in total harmony with nature it would seem. There are a couple of dogs in the sauna. Miranda and Flex run a pretty tight ship over at the pool. The steam room, sauna and whirlpool are just beyond the pool. That whole area is always busy it seems. Wait a second. What is going on? I just saw Miranda followed by Flex go into the supply closet. They haven't come out yet. The dogs are all alone! I have to tell someone. Oh, gosh, there is a Lhasa apso and a boxer going at “it”. What a second, I will be right back........
Sorry for the delay folks. I think the “situation” is resolved. I didn't realize it but the Fitness Center is equipped with state of the art security alarms and cameras. I told the desk clerk, Wendy what I saw. OMG, she pushed a few buttons and the whole place got locked down including the supply closet. The manager Walt rushed to the supply closet, caught the two, Miranda and Flex in inappropriate attire (nothing) and an inappropriate embrace of sorts. He suggested they get their clothing, and emphatically commanded them to leave the premises and never return. Hope Miranda and Flex have a happy life. I can't speculate about what will happen to the two dogs who were having a good time. I guess time will tell. Walt may want to mention the incident to the owners.
As I wrap it up from the Fitness Center, I would like to give a big shout out to my niece's daughter. She and teammates competed in the USSSA Fast Pitch World Series tournament last week. Their team was in the 10U class. They placed fourth in the World Series for that class. Pretty darn good and pretty proud of her and her teammates. Maybe next year they can qualify and take the whole thing.
I am on a mission today. I am out to procure a new supply of French Roast beans. I am completely out. My supply is gone, nil, kaput, empty, and exhausted. I just had Starbacks version of French Roast. They don't seem to understand what French Roast is supposed to taste like. It is NOT to taste like my dirty socks! No more Starbacks for me. I am off to Iowa City to refill my bean bin.
Hope you all have a great day and a better tomorrow. There is no need to thank me for this valuable information: I'm doing it as a public service. – TA!
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