The Gestapo has settled down a little bit. I think they are kind of thin with staff taking vacations and such. Last week I related how one neighbor down the street had not put his brush in the YARDY correctly. Well, my next door neighbor, MacBlu, sent me this snippet after reading the blog.
"I wondered about that "Yardy" filled to overflowing down the street. The day before I was going over to the bank and since there was no traffic I kind of crowded the center line. As I went by, my radio antenna caught on something and started whipping around. I thought, "What the hell." (Actually my words were more profound than that.) I looked back and one of the branches in the "Yardy" was sticking six feet out into the street. I couldn't figure why some body had stuffed their yard waste in the "Yardy" that way. They must have had a brain cramp!"
I hadn't thought too much about "brain cramps" lately. But now that I think about it, this would explain a lot of stupid things people do. A brain cramp is defined as "A stupid, perhaps embarrassing, mistake; commonly confused with brain-fart (which is an idea)." Now don't get Brain Cramp confused with Brain Fart which is defined commonly as "A sudden and involuntary (although depending on the source, not altogether unexpected) release of ignorance." You may also get it confused with Brainfartitis which we all know as
"The sudden stop of brain functions in an extreme moment of need." I can't attest to which of these conditions the poor guy suffered from but I am certain that he will not try to pull that on the Garbage Gestapo again.
Sorry, I am once again late with this blog. Y'all will begin to lose confidence in my blogging ability. Today, I had a legitimate excuse - a doctor's appointment. Tuesday's duties have been satisfied, my head is clear (as clear as it gets anyway) and my fingers are anxiously trying to find the correct keys. You know, when I hit 66 years of age, I noticed that there is a definite slowdown in communication between my fingers and my brain. My brain will tell any of my fingers that are listening to type "Yeah" for instance. More often than not it will be "Yeha" the first time around. We have all done that from time to time. What concerns me is the increasing frequency of these occurrences.
We seem to be nicely settled into our bathroom. The chaos is over, tools put away, and the "Return to Menard's" pile has been created. It is satisfying to see it in action. I think I mentioned that we got this energy efficient toilet which is 2 inches taller than the old one. I think I mentioned earlier that I was having a little difficulty with the blood being cut off in my legs since they don't touch the floor anymore. Extended stays on the pot are out of the question now. I am building a small step stool about 6 inches tall. I feel this will be tall enough to allow me to again do my duty in comfort and for as long as it takes.
Last week I mentioned the next project. Well, I got it started last week. I rented a sod cutter from the hardware store. Now it didn't work quite like I would have liked. I had it set to its maximum depth but it didn't go in very well. All in all, I made 3 trips over the area to get the grass off. I laid the edgers on Friday. On Sunday, Mother's Day, the girls and granddogs came over for lunch. The meal was good and they presented their Mom with a bunch of new towels and wall hangings that Jenny the elder made. After the festivities, we all went out back and got the landscaping all done. I had a leather harness made for my current wife so she could pull our yard wagon filled with mulch and edgers. It worked great when I could get her to let me hook it up. That was not an easy task believe me. She seemed to take exception to being used like an ox or something. Here is a picture of what we ended up with.
Next project is already to begin. This one involves building a retaining wall that is 35' long and rebuilding any existing one so they both can be merged together. A local lumber yard, okay it is Menard's, will be delivering 325 retaining wall blocks. I am using a smaller variety that only weighs about 18 lbs. each. The bigger ones are around 55 lbs. I feel I will have a better chance of getting this done with lighter blocks. Have I mentioned to any of you that I really don't enjoy doing this stuff. Fortunately, the leather harness has held up nicely and my current wife is getting plenty of rest this week. She will have some long days in the harness. I keep reminding her that when it is all done, she will really really like it (I hope!).
I finally got back to Grandpaw Bailey's Fitness Center and Spa yesterday. The staff kept the wheels on for the most part it seems. Nice to have good help. I have been fortunate. All too often young people these days expect a paycheck without adequately performing their assigned tasks. They also don't understand what "work ethic" is which is unfortunate for all of us. Iowa, being a farming state, has had generations of families raised on the farm who know what hard work really means. A kid with the baggy pants with the waist down around you know what just would be able to handle the rigors of baling hay or shelling corn or even walking soybean fields cutting out weeds. We should have a requirement that would put every kid out on a farm for a summer to experience farm life and see what work ethic entails. It could be between their junior and senior years and be a requirement for graduation. Sorry, went off topic for a moment. Seems as though the construction is in its final stages on the expansion. I am really getting excited. The indoor running track is complete. Kinnick has tried it out already and seems to be comfortable with the feel of the track. He has really been eyeing the pool that is being built inside the track. This lab LOVES the water. He will get wet every chance he gets. I am having a launch platform built for dock diving training. I have a small Jacuzzi installed. Barney the pug seems especially fond of just relaxing in it. I hope he doesn't get so relaxed that he falls asleep and drowns. Not a fun thought.
In a moment of unusual mental clarity, I hired a young thing named Mandy. She has a college degree and is an expert in pet massage therapy, aroma therapy, and natural/organic nutrition. This was sheer genius on my part. I ran the routine press release in our local shopper. Holy Cow what a response. We are getting so much interest that I am having Mandy train a couple others as assistants and I am feverishly looking to hire another similarly qualification person. With the increase in foot traffic here at the spa, the library branch couldn't be happier. They are picking up new members as a result of our endeavors. Pretty darn cool. Rumor has it that somewhere around here an ice cream, yogurt, coffee shop or something is going to be built. That can't be a bad thing either. Business seems to be booming after so many years. I never thought I would get something else going after the Canasta Club ladies left. Oh, there are a few that have trickled back to town disenchanted with the bright lights of the New England Casino business. They come in every once in a while. We sit around the Keurig Coffee Maker talking about the old days. We laugh at some of the crazy stunts that were pulled. I think they kind of miss the club.
I have had the good fortune to connect with some old friends and classmates from my hometown recently. One of them began a Facebook group titled "You know you are from XXXXX, if you......" This is soooo much fun for me. Anyone who grew up in a small Iowa farm town recognizes just how valuable those memories are. People post photos from the old days and we comment on it. It is almost as good as getting together, face to face. Thanks a lot gang it is fun.
Many of you know my preference for French Roast Coffee in the morning. For some time now I have noticed that the robust French Roast flavor has gone missing. My taste buds may have gotten fried or something, maybe the coffee beans themselves is the culprit. The bottom line is that I am not enjoying the French Roast like I used to. The French Roast I have been using is organic. It is not just some coffee beans that were swept up off the floor. These are first class beans. What to do, What to do? Suggestions? I'm afraid I had better get on doing something like mowing the lawn or the like before I get busted. So until we meet again, may the wind be at your back. TA!
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